Steering wheel lock warning, windows refusing to go down and battery draining rather quickly.
Fast forward back to 2019 Helga was doing the same thing, battery and Body Control Module were replaced. Just hoping this time it is just the battery.
Time for a tortuous journey to Epsom Downs to see Mr Pugh and Mr Pattinson for his delicious breakfast.
Just arrived home from there! Journey from here is straightforward but long. M25 was fine. Glad I was't going through other way though. I got my lunch at London Bridge as there was a twenty minute gap between trains. But Pattinsons is very nice. I haven't tried their new place yet.
Have you tried removing the earth connection for a minute & reconnecting
It's a computer with 4 wheels, it'll probably invent a few DTC's when it reboots, but then you can see what remains if anything.
Fingers crossed that it's only the battery